How psychological pain is created, and how to get rid of it. Greetings! This is a short note with keys to understanding how psychological pain is created and mechanisms for getting rid of it. The first thing we will agree on is definitions. Psychological pain is pain created not by the situation itself, but by a cognitive process of perception, such as a thought or memory and the emotion associated with it. In fact, this definition also contains the mechanism for the formation of psychological pain - the process of connecting a thought with the feeling of it and the reaction to the thought as to what is happening in reality. And this moment very often eludes us: we do not notice that we are reacting at the moment to thoughts, and not to real situations. Thoughts can be divided into subjectively pleasant, unpleasant and neutral. Why are they like this? Due to what emotion and sensation they are linked to. So, thanks to this coupling, you can experience psychological suffering, regardless of the environment - because we always carry with us a thought-generating machine - our mind. And this machine, by the way, can spread an emotional reaction from one thought to another, which it will connect with the first, and so on. And, as you already understand, this can happen infinitely and automatically. Thus, psychological pain can take up more and more space in our mind space and leave less and less space for you. What to do about it? We cannot stop the process of generating thoughts with our mind, and there is no need, because... This is an extremely useful tool - it's called thinking. But in this process, that same emotional pain will inevitably arise. In order to deal with it, you need to fulfill two points: 1. Be able to notice thoughts as thoughts (as opposed to being caught up in endless chains of thoughts).2. Be able to open up to the sensation caused by a thought in the present moment. In order for the extinction reaction to occur (extinction occurs automatically and collaterally when openly in contact with the sensation, unless the mind again begins to fight the sensation). That's it. There is no need to change, challenge, or decide anything in relation to thoughts and the reaction they create. These two points are absolutely sufficient, moreover, any attempt to somehow activate additionally the “problem-solving mind” in relation to internal processes will lead to an interruption of the extinction reaction and will support the usual cycle of merging/struggle with thoughts and feelings. If you want to read another article on this topic, here is the link: How language can create various psychological problems (anxiety, PA, OCD, PTSD, etc.) If you need help specifically for your situation, sign up for consultations ( WhatsApp, Telegram, personal messages).Psychologist Kirill Kryzhanovsky