Why pay a psychologist? If the meeting with the psychologist was spent on pleasant social chatter, you bought a ticket for the tram and went on foot. *** What does a psychologist do? Creates the right conditions so that you can open up and touch on something important to yourself that worries you. He provides you with his time, his competencies and his personality so that you can feel and survive, with his support, what is poisoning your life. *** Why do I need his identity? When there is another person nearby, especially a prepared one, experiences flow differently and it is easier to cope with them. Worrying alone is the path to neurosis. Together - recovery. In general, the personality of a psychologist is his instrument. In any contact we show stereotypes of our interactions. The psychologist will catch them by tracking his feelings in contact with you. *** What if I already know what my problem is? You may think you know the cause of the problem, but most likely it is just another mind trap. True experiences are deeply hidden. You jump from one thing to another, and everything seems to be wrong, it doesn’t get any easier. A psychologist knows how to detect the very sick thing that controls your life from the subconscious. The higher his skill, the faster he will discover your hidden need. *** Is talking through the problem not enough? The psychologist does not just let you talk. He listens to you professionally, noting emotional moments that you skip past, paying attention to body language, slips of the tongue, spontaneous reactions. Your pain, like a criminal, hides well, but it itself gives clues and leaves traces so that it can be found as quickly as possible. *** How to behave with a psychologist? A psychologist's office is a safe space where you can be yourself. There's no need to pretend here. The psychologist will not be friends with you, will not conduct any business with you other than therapy. Your relationship exists only in this office. *** What if you’re scared to be yourself? Many people live in the belief that if they showed themselves as real, as they are, then everyone would immediately turn away. But these are just parts of your personality that you are used to suppressing or denying in yourself. The psychologist knows this and will support you if you are scared. *** What is the benefit? You can (and should!) express your feelings to a psychologist. Talk about what hurts. Look where it's scary. Bring out of the shadows into the light everything that is gradually interfering. For example, on a family secret or on what is accepted in the family “by default”... There is zero pleasure, but then, like after an operation, relief and healing comes. *** What if the feelings are too strong? If resentment has been building up for a long time, anger has been suppressed for years, guilt has been avoided, and grief has been delayed, it will take longer to work with them. Each time their intensity will decrease. And you will notice that they no longer control you. Recurring problematic situations will stop repeating in your life. *** Isn’t it easier to pour out your heart to your friends? Friends' reactions are difficult to predict. It can help, or it can hurt you even more. The psychologist is prepared to endure this and knows how to drain the psychic waste. Again, your friends didn’t hire you, but the psychologist did, that’s his job. *** Is it dangerous to let the genie out of the bottle? Sometimes people think that if they start listening to their feelings and expressing them, it will lead to destructive consequences. You will want to destroy everything and everyone. Therefore, you need to start in a psychologist’s office. He knows how to do it in an environmentally friendly, therapeutic and non-destructive way. *** What can you learn new about yourself? Our mind is cunning, and has come up with dozens of ways to deceive us, distorting our image of ourselves. As a result, you end up being the only one who, relatively speaking, considers himself blue when others see you as green. And if this meets the goals of therapy, the psychologist will bring your defense mechanisms to light. You will be surprised. *** Or maybe this is not for me? Going to a psychologist is not pleasant. Just like going to the dentist. But if you don’t walk, over time it may become increasingly difficult for both you and others to deal with you. It is customary for cultured people to take care of hygiene.