From the author: This article was published on August 29, 2012 here: A lot of questions have recently appeared that are directly related to the crisis of three years. What is the crisis of three years, and what is it used for? I decided to describe this period of children in such a classic way, so that their parents and all those who are directly related to raising children would know how to react to their behavior. So, let's begin... If your child has already approached or crossed the threshold of three years of age, then do you know firsthand what the daily tantrums of a baby are like? The thing is that in the first years of life a child is mentally and physically dependent on his mother, and therefore it is difficult for him to let her go even one step away from him, it is difficult for him to endure separation from her. During this period, the child, like a sponge, absorbs a great amount of information. Time passes, and the baby, exploring space, sees the fruits of his activities, is delighted with the awareness of his influence on the world around him (if you throw a ball, it will start jumping, and if you cry and scream for a long time, they will give you what you want). The child copies adults, uses their vocabulary, “takes on” different roles, and takes part in role-playing games. At this age, the toddler shows interest in his peers and begins to play games with them. The child’s self-confidence grows: “I can do this myself! I’m already big, like dad and mom!” The baby begins to understand that he is an independent person and, not understanding the danger, wonders why adults always pull him back, decide everything for him, educate him and forbid something. Thus, it turns out that the child’s crisis is recognized as an internal contradiction between “I can” and “I want.” Signs of a 3-year-old crisis Self-will. The kid wants to do everything himself, despite the fact that he himself still doesn’t know how to do anything. Allow your child to do everything himself, even if you are sure that he cannot do it! After all, by making mistakes, he gains experience! Give him more time to complete the task, and be patient and watch how he completes it. After some time, everything will start to work out for the baby, and then he definitely needs to be praised. Stubbornness. If a child is stubborn and tries to insist on his own, then this is not at all because he wants it, but because he decided so! Try to switch his attention - offer him something in return. Obstinacy and negativism. Sometimes the baby acts not only against his parents, but also against his wishes, and all only because he was asked to do so, and not he himself decided so. Therefore, try, instead of the imperative form: “Let’s go for a walk!”, gently ask the child about his desire: “Sunny! Shall we go for a walk today?” Or cheat - ask your child a question so that any answer suits you: “Are we going to go for a walk to the park or to the playground today?” The child organizes a protest-revolt as a response to pressure from his parents, not wanting to succumb to their pressure (“Don’t spoil!”, “Don’t break anything!”, “Don’t make noise!”, “Sit on the sofa!”). Sooner or later, the child’s violent energy comes out in the form of anger or hysterics, however, at the same time, stress arises, which, as a result, reduces the child’s immunity. If your baby is hysterical, wait it out calmly, and then explain to him how to behave “correctly” and why. Symptom of devaluation. At this stage of the child’s research activity, he depreciates not only the toys he likes to play with, but also the close people around him. The baby suddenly begins to break his favorite toys and may hit his mother. During this period, he imitates adults and checks their reaction to his negative behavior. Try to direct your baby's energy in a peaceful direction. Despotism. Even at such a tender age, the baby strives to control the world around him, trying to force his parents to do what he wants. You need to understand that a child’s desire for leadership is a good character trait.