From the author: Resentment is a bitter-salty cocktail and a person mixes it in his heart. Pain pierces like a sharp arrow, a surprised look asks: “How could you?” Realization: “Yes, this happened” and then righteous anger. All? Of course not. Next, the most important stage of the mixing process begins. Pain and anger are “volatile” substances. The treated pain goes away. Expressed anger is released. Need a binding agent. Something that will give the mixture stability and durability. This is where a person resorts to a secret ingredient. RESULT. It is this that holds the entire system together and a person can use the newly mixed potion at his own discretion. But everyone has their own discretion and one can only be amazed at the variety. For example: Someone who offended MUST feel ashamed and MUST change. Tatyana is 30 years old. She is very, very upset with her mother. And of course there is a reason for it, because she was a “bad” mother throughout Tanya’s childhood. There is a lot of pain and anger in the stories and they don’t go away, nothing changes, because mom is there and still remains “bad.” And so, the pain and anger were named and lived, but the resentment remained. I ask: “Why?” Answer: “I don’t want to forgive, since she doesn’t want to change!” Resentment is a defense against future pain. A wife lives with her husband. And the husband is so-so, he drinks, beats, and doesn’t bring money into the house. And I don’t have the strength to get a divorce, and how can I live? Resentment comes to the rescue; it always helps create distance. At a distance, the pain becomes quite bearable. Resentment is a way to feel “on top.” It is difficult to live with resentment. And bitter and salty. But there is a secret sweetness in it. After all, next to someone who has offended you, you can always feel “higher,” better, kinder, etc. Seeing and, most importantly, admitting this is not easy for a person. Resentment is a way to “show face.” Now the story is the other way around. A husband lives with his wife, and she cheats on him. Not just like that, but she packed her things and left for someone else. And so, they have been living separately for a long time and each has their own family. And the resentment gnaws and gnaws. I ask: “Why?”, He answers, “You can’t do this with me?” This is how a person lives with resentment in his heart. And she is poisonous... What to do? You can take a risk and try to forgive. It will be difficult at first. It is difficult to allow another to not live up to our expectations. It is difficult to make a decision and stop being fed by the imaginary “sweetness” of resentment. It's hard to find your true face. But, “the road can be mastered by the one who walks”, if there is a desire.