Excerpt from an article by Yulia Pirumova: “Any possibility of losing contact with a rapist, stalker and tyrant (in general, with any toxic partner) is impossible in itself, without therapy, precisely because , that along with it there is a threat to something important to die. Interrupting a toxic connection is a threat to the existence of the “adaptive” Self. And only in therapeutic contact with another person is it possible to detect interruptions of one’s true Self and consolidate other affects-reactions... And the paradox. The point is that the weaker the connection, or the more toxic it is, the more effort a person makes in all significant relationships to reproduce his usual patterns of maintaining the connection. That is, the more dependent he is on the “adaptive” Self. good, of course, the whole world tells him that it’s time to change..." Yes, therapy provides a resource in the form of positive introjects (positive experiences of support and acceptance), with which the client is filled and then the opportunity and strength appears to integrate the image of the partner into a holistic one and see him as he is and withstand disappointment and reality, the truth that he avoided recognizing by all means and defenses. And then separation and rupture of relationships will no longer be so destructive and fatal for the Ego, but there will be support in the form of a new experience of therapist support. This is the value of long-term and high-quality therapy. Get saturated with what you were deprived of in childhood and become more stable and independent! And get rid of psychological defenses in the form of splitting, for example, which prevents you from seeing and perceiving the integrity of yourself and others! This process is not fast, but for the sake of liberation and health, I don’t feel sorry for money, time, or effort! Therapy for me is like hygiene of the soul, which needs to be taken care of, treated when it hurts, given time and attention.!