Any human relationships invariably go through stages of warmth and coldness, attraction and rejection in their development. Conflicts are inevitable between people. And at the same time, many forget that a conflict situation, if carried out according to certain agreements, can not only be resolved with a satisfactory outcome, but also improve the quality of relations between the former conflicting parties. The rules for managing conflict between spouses are especially relevant. Since it is precisely because of the intensity of feelings towards each other that in conflict situations it is especially difficult to adhere to any rules of behavior. If both husband and wife, in quiet moments of their togetherness, strive and want to resolve disagreements that arise usefully, then a sober head can conclude a contract. This means reading the rules below carefully and discussing what can be difficult when emotions are overwhelming. How can we help each other stick to a constructive line? And promise yourself and your partner that everyone will follow these laws. In order for the relationship to continue and improve. 1 rule. A constructive “debriefing” must be by mutual agreement!!! A time that is comfortable for both is chosen. And it is always limited from the very beginning! This gives you the opportunity to tune in and understand that this will not last forever. And also divide your responsibility for the decision in half. Rule 2. For a constructive dispute, one topic must be defined, and not several at once!!! When everyone in a conversation begins to jump around and find new reasons for presenting and indignation, it is impossible to solve anything, because... blurred. And the dialogue is like a skirmish. Rule 3. You CANNOT use low blows: Generalizations “You always do this”, “You never remember”, “Today you are as usual...”, etc. Remember previous mistakes!!! If you discussed and closed the topic, for example , an unfulfilled promise, then it is important to close the topic with compensation that will satisfy the partner and, as it were, repay him for the discomfort. When a partner tries to use the same card for the second and tenth time: “But remember, you promised and didn’t do it...” - this is not a fair game.., Like repeated extortion for what he has already paid for. CANNOT be compared with someone!!! “But my first husband knew how to do it better!” You CANNOT use personal characteristics and physical defects as arguments in an argument!!! “If only you had big breasts,” “With your size, you’d better keep quiet.” YOU CANNOT appeal to others persons!!! “But your mother would now say...”, “I’m sure Marya Ivanovna. Whom you respect so much, you would never allow yourself to do this.” 4th rule. It's good to end on a positive note. Even if the time has expired and nothing has been agreed upon. The responsibility for this lies with the initiator of the quarrel. “I’m glad we discussed this (started discussing).” It is important to form a positive attitude towards the very fact of the conversation that happened, and not towards the result.5 rule. The initiator of the quarrel is the moderator of the process!!! Responsible for: identifying the topic order of speaking the timing of the speakers following the rules results desired to be expressed and solutions “If we could listen to me for half an hour a day, I would be more satisfied with the relationship.” In fact, following these five rules only at first may seem like too much of a task : “There are emotions, the partner is annoying, and also think about the rules!” If you initially treat them as boundaries, the observance of which will help maintain a good relationship, then having respect for your partner, love becomes possible, and in a difficult period, in the presence of not the most pleasant feelings, to deal with negative situations and emotions carefully and without destroying what what we built together.