The birth of a child is a major change in any family. Not everyone is ready for this, and conception can be a surprise, not always pleasant. An unplanned pregnancy means a lot of stress, worries, thoughts about whether to keep the child. “It can’t be!” – the test showed two stripes. Shock, fear, horror. What to do? If you keep your child, your life will change. Can I love him? How will the child's father accept an unplanned pregnancy? A woman, upon learning about an unplanned pregnancy, experiences a variety of feelings. Some planned to have a child a little later, others did not want to have children at all. In any case, conception took place. Many parents decide to keep the child. However, this comes with some difficulties. The first is the need to accept the fact of pregnancy and the fact that in a few months a new family member will appear. The second is to make adjustments to your own life. Society imposes that a child is wonderful, a woman must certainly love him. Yes, a lot depends on the mother’s love and acceptance. But you cannot love by force. Therefore, a woman will have to cope with conflicting feelings. Despite the internal protest, many women decide to give birth: consciously or under pressure from loved ones. However, this does not solve the problem instantly, because the pregnancy was unplanned, which means the woman is completely unprepared for it. WHAT TO DO IN THE EVENT OF AN UNPLANNED PREGNANCY? Fear is a natural mental reaction to stress. In the first weeks, the external manifestations of pregnancy are not yet noticeable, but hormonal changes are already occurring in the body. For the further development of the fetus, it is important how ready a woman is to accept pregnancy and lead a healthy lifestyle. The support of loved ones also matters. It is especially difficult for expectant mothers whose child’s father does not plan to participate in his upbringing. However, even in this case, you can find strength in yourself and accept the birth of a new life. Pregnancy and family Some women do not know how to inform their partner about future parenthood. But this will have to be done, since both parents took part in the conception. What to do: 1. Remain calm and aware.2. Talk to the child's father. This will have to be done in any case, because it will not be possible to hide the pregnancy.3. Complete all necessary examinations. There are pathologies that are detected early.4. Discuss the situation with your partner and how to proceed. The support of a loved one at this moment is very important. The pregnancy came at the wrong time, but, in principle, the family wanted a child. At a certain stage of life, the appearance of a child is considered undesirable by the family or individual members. These could be various life circumstances, career development, financial problems. As a result, a conflict arises: abandon the child or lose something significant. The woman understands perfectly well what she will lose. Therefore, it is important to find and realize what will be acquired. Is your job so important that you are willing to terminate your pregnancy? If living conditions are not very good, there is not enough finances, then in many cases this is a reason for improvements and changes in living space. It is important that the mother does not cope with difficulties alone, but receives support from her husband and parents. The appearance of a child will change life in any case , relationships with others, will set priorities in a new way. And here you need to understand for yourself, realize the basic values ​​of life. When it is impossible to terminate a pregnancy, and it is unwanted. The reasons why it is impossible to have an abortion in this case are different: health problems, the husband’s desire to have an heir at all costs, one’s own beliefs (to terminate the pregnancy bad) etc. A woman may not be ready, does not want to have children, but an accidental pregnancy has turned everything in her life upside down, and the expectant mother decides that since it happened, she will have to come to terms with it. But another question arises: will maternal feelings arise? , love, affection for the baby? The fact is that in the case of an unplanned pregnancy, the risk is increasedpostpartum depression. That is why consultation with a psychologist is advisable. Early pregnancy outside of marriage In modern society, pregnancy in minors is becoming more common. The situation causes shock both for the expectant mother and her parents. You will have to accept the fact that your minor child has actually become an adult. In this case, it is necessary not only to immediately register for pregnancy, but also to visit a psychologist in order to avoid irreparable mistakes. STAGES OF ACCEPTING AN UNPLANNED PREGNANCY By analogy with any stressful situation, the psyche of a pregnant woman goes through several stages: 1. Shock. Disbelief, surprise, fear. The duration ranges from several minutes, when the woman immediately comes to her senses, to several hours. First thoughts: “I don’t want to”, “How did this happen”, “Now is not the time.”2. Awareness. Lasts up to three weeks. There is still hope that the test was wrong, and the woman is looking for confirmation of this. A decision is made: to keep the child or not. At this stage, you need to find support among loved ones in order to regain a sense of reality and start thinking about the future.3. Appearance of anxiety. Even a planned pregnancy can cause anxiety, but in the case of an unplanned pregnancy, emotions can be stronger. The future is seen in a negative light. At this stage, it’s worth not thinking about unfulfilled plans for a while - you can always return to work, finish your studies, the deadlines just shift a little.4. Stabilization of emotions, beginning of planning. It is not necessary that feelings for the child have already appeared, but the woman understands that changes are coming and she needs to prepare for them. To make it easier to cope with emotions and avoid negative, anxious thoughts, you can play a game: imagine the image of a baby, what it will look like, a boy or a girl.5. Adoption. There was complete awareness. The child fits into the picture of the future. Preparations for childbirth are underway, including psychological ones. Of course, fears, worries, and doubts may appear from time to time, but usually you can cope with them. HOW TO ACCEPT PREGNANCY You found out that you are pregnant. To begin with, put aside panic - you will need to weigh everything carefully and wisely, and unnecessary emotions will get in the way.1. Talk to the child's father. Of course, there are situations when a woman, for some reason, decides not to report her pregnancy, but in most cases the partner should be informed.2. Realize that changes are coming in your life. You have new responsibility. Life will not be the same. However, the child is a part of you, your continuation. If you don't yet experience maternal feelings, this does not mean that they will not arise later. Just realize that things are different now and you need to look at your life differently.3. Find out how ready the partner is for fatherhood, how he sees his future role. However, you should not be upset if the father is not ready yet - you are not responsible for the emotions of another person, and fatherly feelings may awaken later. A woman feels a child already on a physical level, but for a man it is still abstract, somewhere in the future.4. Do some planning. Understand what will change in your life, decide how to prepare for the changes. For example, you will have to interrupt your studies - take an academic leave, temporarily step away from your favorite job (in some families the husband goes on maternity leave or it is possible to hire a nanny).5. Work on your thoughts and fears. It is unlikely that you will be able to do this alone. Talk to a person you trust: husband, mother. If this is not possible, consult a psychologist. It is not necessary to visit a specialist in person; many work online. The condition of the mother largely affects the development of the fetus. If a woman experienced severe stress during pregnancy, this can cause premature birth and problems with the child’s nervous system. Therefore, it is necessary for the expectant mother to cope with her negative emotions and tune in to a positive outcome. Don't try to force your child to love you. Children feel their mother's attitude. If psychological problems arise,