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From the author: Those who want to have worthy children will act wisely if they first make themselves worthy parents. St. Philaret of Moscow. Do we know our children? And how do we know them? What do we need to know about them so that they grow up to be confident and independent individuals? What is the role of the parent in this contribution?What is the first thing parents need to know?1. Our children do not belong to us. We, as parents, need our children for a certain period of time to help them grow up, gain independence and go on their own path in life. Therefore, considering a child as “personal property”, “property” is meaningless. With such a position, conflict is inevitable and, as a result, a breakdown in relationships on a spiritual level. A child is a separate independent person and the task of parents is to help them gain independence from us. A child should not be held responsible for the parents' choice to give birth to him. Some parents give birth to children with a “benefit” for themselves: so that they can give someone a glass of water in their old age. Such parents manipulate their children, control them through feelings of guilt, and thereby destroy the child’s psyche. I would like to ask: where does such cruelty towards one’s own child come from? The laws of the Universe are harmonious, and a period of retribution for what they have done will inevitably follow: the hunted and ruined Human Soul. The task of parents is to work on their own Soul, their own problems, so as not to overshadow the joyful period of joint growth of the Human Soul. By clearing the way from the problems that have accumulated in the past, you rise to a new level of relationship with your child, because your consciousness is no longer so distorted by the traumas received.2. Every child, regardless of age, is worthy of respect. A child is the same person as you and I, adults. The only difference is that he is defenseless. But, you must agree, how can a strong (adult) offend a weak (child)? Unfortunately, in life the opposite happens: every now and then I hear and see how parents abuse their children. At what level of consciousness development are such parents? Satisfying their lower needs (for power, for superiority), parents suppress the child’s personality, the growth of the Soul does not occur and the child is forced to remain in an underdeveloped state, even as an adult... Here is one of the typical examples of an underdeveloped adult: a 50-year-old man who is unable to accept an independent decisions and runs to mommy for any reason. Sound familiar? Disrespect for a child in childhood is fraught with a lack of self-esteem in an adult. Such people often do not have their own point of view, they are led, they look for authorities. Disrespect for oneself makes them dependent on other people and often causes chemical dependencies: such a person hates himself inside, does not see his own worth and suffers from negative feelings arising from the experience of disrespect and even humiliation of the child’s personality acquired in childhood.3. The child’s picture of the world is formed by his closest relatives. It is very important to know what influence the closest relatives have on the child: parents or people replacing them; what messages do they convey to this child. Under favorable circumstances (the child is good in himself, needed, loved), basic trust in the world begins to form. It is very important for a child to establish that his home and parents are the best. And this child’s picture of the world consists of acceptance, trust, love, joy, self-worth. Under unfavorable circumstances (in an orphanage, dislike for the child, abuse), basic trust is not formed, the world seems hostile and alien to the child. And the picture of the world consists of deception, cruelty, rejection, humiliation. So, the first sign of the formation of a picture of the world will be the attitude of significant adults towards the child. In addition, getting to know the world around you through nursery rhymes, lullabies, jokes, fairy tales, personal contact with the child also forms his picture of the world. It is through popular

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