Thus, in such children, instead of immediate and spontaneous behavior, instead of a golden, carefree childhood, early responsible adulthood and various psychological, psychiatric, somatic disorders arise. And they will also hide these problems, just as their parents hide alcoholism. And instead of feeling love and learning love, they develop in themselves only two feelings - fear and pity. If only this did not remain for the rest of their lives! If this were not passed on through generations! I would like to remind you of the classic parable of Solomon. Her sympathies revealed themselves to me precisely in the context of codependency. Two women came to the sage. They held one child, and each claimed that it was her child. Solomon, seeing that neither would yield, ordered the child to be cut into two parts, and each woman to be given half. As you know, the real mother refused the role of mother in order to save the life of the child. She gave up what really belonged to her in order to save the life of a child. Who do you love more: children, yourself, your husband, or your holy role as Savior? Exercise. Remember your belief that helps you live with an alcoholic. For example, My children and I will become happy when my husband stops drinking. Yes, in ten years, when neither I nor the children are healthy, my husband will stop drinking and we will become happy .Yes, when I myself need psychiatric help, and the children become alcoholics, my husband will stop drinking, and we will live a happy life. A very psychotherapeutic anecdote. A man is driving a car, everything is visible: the road, the signs, the dividing strip. It’s a pleasure to drive. But suddenly it’s foggy, you can’t see anything. All landmarks have disappeared. It’s scary to go, but it’s necessary. He drives slowly, is tense, and is already sweating. Suddenly, he saw the dimensions of another car ahead. He was happy, settled in, and it immediately became easier to drive. He relaxed and even began to scold the one who was driving ahead, saying that he was driving slowly. I drove and drove, and lo and behold, the headlights disappeared. He was upset and tense, but he moved on. Suddenly there was a blow, a car jumped out, the headlights were off, and a man was standing. “Why did you turn off the headlights? I crashed my car because of you!” “So I thought that in my garage I could turn off».