From the author: Blessing your parents is as important as your children. By choosing mature decisions and actions, you create your life and your happiness. Happiness is different from parental happiness. Many articles have been written about parental blessing. Confessors, psychologists, and psychotherapists believe that it is important to bless children. Bless both small children and adult children. Adult children, especially in cases where we do not agree with their choice (choice of educational institution, profession, friends, life partner, etc.) We can have our own opinion and feelings associated with their choice, but influence (prohibit, dissuade) we cannot choose them if we want them to become responsible. A blessing is permission, permission to do something. It seems to me that blessing parents is as important as children. Parents are different - both mature and immature, wise and not very, caring and controlling, flexible and inflexible, loving unconditionally or conditionally. Bless different parents - especially immature, inflexible, anxious and controlling, and who do not know how to love. Because such parents need blessings most of all. After all, blessing is the energy of love. Perhaps you will object: “I didn’t receive love from them!”... Perhaps your parents could not give you such an example, because they themselves did not have one. Because they had their own children in childhood trauma, someone was brought up in conditions of unconditional love and did not receive this love in childhood, he developed his own scenario of love and upbringing. Some parents grew up in the post-war years, while others grew up in Soviet times. The personality structure is influenced by many other factors. You can develop by forming your own scenario of love - mature love. Mature love manifests itself as “I am loved because I love,” and immature (childish) love “I love because we are loved.” By choosing mature decisions and actions you create your life and your happiness. Happiness is different from parental happiness. Mature actions and decisions are the way out of dysfunctional relationships. Let me give you a few examples. Example 1: One of your parents plays the role of a victim in life. For example, a Victim Mom constantly complains to you about how “everything is bad”, how bad neighbors, colleagues, etc. Such a mother may call and start complaining that she has Your relationship with your father, your sister or brother, aunt, or colleague is not going well. And she may even ask what she should do. Expectations from you that you start playing the game “Rescuer” (Karpman’s dramatic triangle). Payback If you start joining your mother, you aggravate her negative emotions, beliefs that everything is bad and difficult to resolve. And such topics will be inexhaustible. If you start giving advice, you may end up being extreme and guilty. Responsibility will be shifted to you. If you show aggression, you will also receive aggression in response and a statement that you do not want to listen, are not grateful, etc. Exit: You can express your feelings regarding the situation. Transfer responsibility to your mother by saying: “That I am sure ( a) you will resolve this situation. Stroking and reinforcement. Remember a situation when your mother successfully dealt with such a situation, telling her that at this stage she can solve this problem. The blessing can be expressed both verbally and mentally. The phrase “I bless you” can be replaced with the phrase wishing you good luck in solving this problem. The term “blessing” means “good words.” The question arises: “What words can you use to bless?” – You can bless with a simple word “bless”, or you can wish from the heart good things and happiness. But blessings are not made by words alone. Every person on earth every day, consciously or not, gives blessings to those who brought him happiness, and sends negative energy to those who caused him suffering. Think about what energy you send? Example 2: Your parents violate your boundaries. Options for violating boundaries: Mother calling his adult daughter at work and asking: “Have you eaten?” And in the evening: “Have you checked all the children’s lessons?” etc. The mother calls her adult son and asks “Are you!