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Most often, the separation crisis occurs at the age of 7-9 months and lasts from two weeks to two months. It’s just that one morning the child changes beyond recognition in his behavior - he doesn’t let you go a single step, he doesn’t sit with anyone, not even his father, he spends most of the time in his mother’s arms, and even your very thought about “escape” to the kitchen or out the front door the door is cut off at the root by a loud child's cry. WHAT SUDDENLY HAPPENED? A logical stage in the child's mental development occurred when he began to realize himself separately from his mother. For a long time, he did not feel boundaries in the mother-child dyad, feeling like a continuation of his mother, an inseparable part of him. The mobility skills he has acquired are beginning to show that the baby can move away and be a slightly independent individual entity. The current stage of intellectual development does not allow us to understand the fact that the mother leaves and does not retire completely, the fact that she will return and has her own affairs. All this causes increased anxiety, the fear that the baby may be left completely alone in a big and frightening world! All this results in the following symptoms of a separation crisis: Problems with putting the baby to sleep – it becomes very difficult to put the baby to bed, about putting the baby down by someone other than the mother – there is not even a question; Protest against habitual actions: eating, bathing, playing games that the baby loves; Frequent waking up at night, which has not been observed before - there is an opinion that waking up is associated with checking if the mother is nearby; The baby does not allow him to move a single step , begins to hang on his legs or clothes, breaking away with loud crying; Constant demand for the mother’s attention and demonstrative rejection of other loved ones. At this stage of development, there may also be a fear of “strangers” people. HOW TO SURVIVE A SEPARATION CRISIS? Try to smoothly leave for the next room, encourage the baby to search and “be there” in a positive manner, play hide and seek within the room; Do not stop communicating with grandmothers and grandfathers, being close to the child in their company; Do not interrupt the attempts of other close adults to take the baby in your arms, but if he cries, be sure to take him back; When leaving the child with someone else, say goodbye, hug, kiss, smile goodbye. Under no circumstances leave while the baby is not looking; Devote as much time and attention to the child as possible during this period. WHAT NOT TO DO? Ignore the baby’s crying of fear, give him a feeling of acceptance and closeness at this difficult moment; Leave the child with other loved ones people, “dissolve” without saying goodbye; Show that you are anxious and upset when you leave. The main task of a mother in a separation crisis is to try to smooth out and soften the child’s fears as much as possible, without undermining basic trust in the world. After all, the most important thing for him now is you! If at this stage you have problems that you cannot solve on your own, write to me and we will try to find a solution to the problem together! You can read even more useful information in my VK group.

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