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I'm not a robot

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From the author: I am interested in your questions and comments. A woman expecting a child is a woman expecting a miracle. She often imagines the birth of a baby by drawing pictures in her imagination down to the smallest detail, alternating this with bright moments, without changing her schedule radically enough. She may buy different dowries for the baby and dream that they will devote a lot of time to different activities and activities. However, you shouldn’t get carried away with this. Often, what we have may be qualitatively different from what we imagined. And sometimes a young mother is faced with low mood, lack of sleep or insomnia, and apathy. Especially if what we imagined goes against what we actually have. The baby may be whiny, active, or require constant attention. You need to be prepared not only for positive moments, but also have the skills to act in difficult situations when the child cries a lot or if he is sick. He may, after all, simply disagree with the regime that we have developed for him. In any case, in the first months, mother and child will have to “negotiate” a lot and adapt to changes. Preparation will help maintain a good level of stress tolerance for parents, the ability to prevent problems with mood and apathy. It is better if during this period there is an assistant or assistant next to the young mother. A mother, sister, niece or aunt would be suitable for this role. Of course, you shouldn’t forget about the role of the dad. Even if, due to biological characteristics, fathers cannot spend as much time with the baby as mothers, it is quite possible to devote an hour a day to their child, even a very tiny one. Mom can use this time to do things that she enjoys: read a book, watch a movie or go out into the fresh air, or she can do fitness, getting herself into the right shape and maintaining her health. By the way, a new dad should also show concern for to a young mother. He must, like his mother, prepare for this new role, not excluding the possibility of waking up at night and learning the skills of quick recovery and relaxation. It is best to attend courses for future parents with your wife, where, as a rule, they explain in detail how exactly the baby develops in the womb how the woman’s appearance will change and how the recovery process will go after childbirth. By the way, this will prepare you for possible circumstances much better and will allow you to learn to support each other and understand more. When the baby has grown a little and you can safely entrust the care of him to your grandmother or nanny for three or four hours, perhaps you begin to think about to get back to work. The very first question: when is the best time to do this? If need does not force you to start earning money, the sooner the better, then it makes sense to spend more time with your child. Psychologists have proven that in the first three years a child’s attachment to his mother is formed, therefore, parental leave usually lasts that long. The minimum period I would recommend for a young mother to stay at home with her baby is a year. But it’s much better if the mother goes to work when the baby turns three. It is then that he has the first impulses of independence, it is then that his connection with his mother is deeper. Another question that a young mother asks herself is whether she will deprive her child of attention by deciding to return to the workplace. If, for example, you decide to devote yourself entirely to your child, then you must clearly understand that you will not be able to be with him everywhere and everywhere, and sooner or later you will have to part, and such a parting can be very painful for both. This is the first point. The second is that sitting at home and doing everyday life is not always interesting, and be that as it may, this type of activity does not provide great opportunities for personal growth and development. At some point, the child may simply not be interested in being around such!

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