We are used to living the same way. Constantly. Constantly. We strive for regularity and calm. For us, whose age is approaching 40, everything is clear. Well.... to a greater extent it is clear and known. We do a lot of things automatically in everyday life. Without even thinking. And this has its charms. After all, how easy it is to do pleasant things to those you love, especially knowing them for a long time and their passions and desires. However, I don’t know about you, but sometimes I want to feel life. Spicy life! Full of surprises. This could be deliberately speeding where a traffic police representative usually stands, or returning an hour or two later than usual, so that the husband would worry. Or suddenly in a store you start talking to unknown people and realize that you have a lot in common. And yet, when walking to the parking lot from work, you suddenly run to the car, jumping so high that you are afraid to land on your 40-year-old legs. Or, when you go shopping for something ordinary, you suddenly buy provocative underwear and wait until the evening to surprise your husband. I also really want to keep a diary without missing a day. And then it happens, you start a diary, and then you throw it away and somehow you can’t get around to it... And the songs in the car to Armstrong? What a wonderful face I have at this moment). Or get out of bed in the morning, look in the mirror, expecting to see yourself, but see the devil, and laugh so joyfully at him so that he laughs at you in the reflection! And this is all about impulses. About feelings and sensations. About childishness bursting out, which wants to suppress the beginning childishness). I’m talking about the desire to do things, but those after which you won’t recognize yourself, but you will recognize yourself!) At such moments you want to live and life is in full swing. And most importantly, NOTICED!!!!, at such moments strangers start talking to you, want to communicate with you, do something together. And as my daughter said: “Mom, when you are like this, I want you to become little, and I would carry you with me everywhere.” And I love myself like this. A little crazy, playful, light. When you don’t feel this heaviness, FORTY!) And you’re flying.....And it’s not difficult to induce this state. You need to feel it, ride it. This is a jerk - followed by flight and wings! It's like a dream in which you can fly! It’s like a long-awaited gift, but one that you gave to yourself. And at this second it is clear that life is incredibly good! I want to live in it! And there are no restraining moments, there is only a desire to feel the taste and smell of air, which is enough for a feeling of flight and happiness.!!!!!