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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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We need energy for life, for realizing desires and needs, for achieving goals, for building relationships with other people. But it happens that there is not enough of it or it seems to slip through your fingers. Let's look at the psychological reasons: 1. Position “Appear and not be.” This is a behavior strategy in which a person is almost completely identified with a certain role/mask, ignoring other roles, without having contact with his true needs, feelings and goals. For example, “Successful woman/man” “Ideal mother/wife”, “Positive/Jolly fellow”, etc. A person has a strong relationship: “If I am successful/ideal/positive, then I will be loved, accepted, respected, I will be significant and needed.” A huge amount of energy is spent on maintaining this image, because you have to ignore, suppress, change everything that does not correspond to it. The solution in this situation will be to work through the parent-child relationship, because initially such a position is established in childhood as a way to receive the attention and love of parents, establish contact with one’s true needs and feelings, and develop other ways to satisfy significant needs.2. “Negative” feelings: anxiety, fear, shame, guilt, anger, etc. Often people try to either fight feelings, or ignore them, or suppress them. Feelings do not disappear from this, they remain in our body and begin to manifest themselves differently, for example, through symptoms, illnesses, accidents, etc. Moreover, it takes a lot of energy to fight, ignore and suppress feelings, which over time leads to a state of deprivation. The solution here is to establish contact with different feelings, realize what is behind these feelings and respond to feelings in an environmentally friendly way for yourself and others.3. Psychotrauma. Psychotrauma is an experience that causes unbearable mental suffering. For example, the loss of a loved one, divorce, violence, humiliation, breakup of a significant relationship, etc. At the moment of injury, one of the parts of our personality is, as it were, “frozen” in order not to come into contact with unbearable pain and to continue living. Over time, maintaining defenses that keep us from getting in touch with the trauma begins to take up a huge amount of energy. The solution in this situation is to respond to the trauma differently in a safe situation (with a specialist) and connect with the injured part.4. Unfinished business and relationships. For example, renovations that last for years. A relationship that ended several years ago, and you are still conducting a mental dialogue with this person, making claims to him, comparing subsequent partners with him. Solution: responding to feelings and ending the relationship.

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