In any close, loving relationship, it is necessary to find the right balance of personal freedom and commitment. When two partners can be together in a way that respects each person's individual space while at the same time expressing unambiguous commitment , then both parties can relax and be who they are. What is it like? You could say that half of each partner belongs to the other. When two halves come together, they form a whole: this is what we call a relationship or family. But there are still two halves left. Your partner may be attached to you, but he still has another half that is not attached to you. The other half may include various favorite hobbies, friends, TV shows, sports, social activities, religious beliefs. Maybe your partner's other half likes to watch reruns of SpotlightParisHilton, but you hate that show. It is better and wiser to respect your partner's freedom, the needs and preferences of his/her other half, and you should not try to control and change that half. At the same time, the two halves that are connected together are clearly united, and therefore each bears a certain responsibility: he is for the well-being of the relationship, she is for the health of the relationship, and both are for their own happiness and the happiness of the other person, if, of course, the Other wants and knows how to be happy in this relationship. Therefore, we need a BALANCE between autonomy and commitment, between individual space and common connections. Commitment is very good because it helps you not to go crazy, not to lose a sense of self-discipline and attentiveness to our speech and actions. But respect for individual space is also very important. Otherwise, you will become controllers and judges, which is unhealthy and leads to the destruction of relationships. If the relationship is too intense, and women love to take over the man completely, both partners become suffocated. But if she/he is completely free, and there is no sense of commitment, respect and discipline, no understanding of common ground, then there is no real heart connection. And that’s what a relationship is - a heart-to-heart exchange. How free are you in a relationship: 0, 50, 100%? How do you know that you are free? Do you believe in greater freedom or greater commitment in close relationships? Online consultations with a psychologist https://vk.com/psicholog_ilina