“A good deed will not be called a marriage.” This is often said by people who have “been married” and had a negative experience. They expected that marriage was a wonderland, but it turned out that living in a marriage is more difficult than having an open relationship. Marriage is the responsibility of the parties, where each person who decides to enter into a marriage takes upon himself certain obligations to his spouse. In every society, there are special rights and responsibilities of the parties to marriage, just as the conditions for marriage are different in different countries, dictated by cultural and historical heritage. But there is one most important aspect of a happy marriage - this is a conscious choice: the choice of a partner, the relationship with one’s neighbor , managing your emotions, desires to share and share, the ability to negotiate, build and maintain your own boundaries, as well as respect for the personal (physical, psychological, emotional) boundaries of your life partner. To love your neighbor you must be able to love yourself (not to be confused with selfishness). If a person does not respect and love himself, he is not able to “adequately feel” another person, allow him to be himself and accept him as he is, without a passionate desire to make him his own. Often girls get married to get away from boring guardianship and pressure from mom and dad. They are under the illusion that marriage is a magical land where everything will be different than in the parental family, not taking into account that all people in one way or another adopt the model of relationships in the parental family. Young wives quickly become disappointed and try to change the situation. Each case has its own “revolutionary” skirmishes. Young people often try to replace one mother with another, and when they discover that the wife is not a mother at all with her sacrifice and abandonment of her own life, they are also disappointed and utter the classic phrase: “A good deed cannot be called marriage.” . And the conclusion is simple: marriage is a union of two equal partners who want to share both grief and joy with a person called a spouse. Advice and love!