I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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Every person knows how to be offended. Some are so successful in this skill that they ruin the lives of themselves and other people every day. It’s hard to walk under the weight of grievances against your wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, boss at work, parents, friends, girlfriends, because they all, as a rule, respond in kind. Adults are offended no less than children, only children quickly forget the offense, and adults suffer for a long time and try to take revenge on the offender. Almost all families break up as a result of grievances that arise, which make life together unbearable, affect the children, and teach them, through the example of their parents, how not to build relationships. It's time to start living without offense, to throw off this burden, let weak and weak-willed people carry it. To be offended is, in fact, based on the meaning of the word - to offend yourself. The reflexive particle “Xia” indicates the direction of the offense. The simplest advice is to stop hurting yourself, but it is the most impossible to implement. Because all adults answer - I can’t, because he (she)…. The following is a list of complaints. The children say - I can’t, because he (she) was the first to start..., then with sobs the truth of the insult and wrongness of the other is confirmed. As you can see, the explanations of adults and children are almost the same. You can stop being offended by understanding a simple thought: offense is always a demand that is stated with certain emotions, expression, and words. Girls often say, I’m not hysterical, but if they push me, I’ll... throw a tantrum. These words can be translated as follows: if I want something, and I don’t get it, then first I endure it, and if again everything doesn’t happen my way, then I will pour out my entire spiritual basement with a certain sound accompaniment on the head of the offender. Next time my requirements will be met immediately. But what should I really do if what I want doesn’t happen and my needs are alien to others? For example, children understand everything - immediately cry. Can adults do it differently? Of course, they can, for example, sulk and not talk for a month, a favorite pastime in families, and also do small nasty things – a favorite pastime at work. There is one problem. An offended person harms not only and not so much those around him, but himself. It’s not for nothing that they say, “They carry water for the offended.” I will say more, they themselves carry the burden of resentment, which causes them more trouble than what caused the resentment. Children often scratch their own faces until they bleed, showing how hard it is for them to be offended, and it’s all your fault. Do you think adults act differently? Remember the grandmothers who clutch their hearts, showing that if their demand is not met, they will be offended and die, and you will be to blame. And to make it natural and look authentic, the body adjusts and really increases the pressure to critical limits. The occurrence of resentment can be monitored and managed, which is achieved with simple techniques and exercises. You can not allow resentment into your heart and soul at all, then it will not manifest itself in the body, this requires training. Living without resentment is easier and much more effective. Imagine that a person is carrying a large weight around his neck, it is heavy, so the world is bad, and people are annoying, because there is a load of resentment, and they still have their own problems. Drop the weight, throw away the grudge - start living easily, without unnecessary burden. At some point it is necessary to do this so as not to bend to the ground under the weight of carrying around unnecessary grievances. You are ready? Pichugin V.G., Ph.D., Associate Professor, Financial University under the Government of the Russian Federation.

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