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The other day I published the book “How to Write a Fairy Tale of a Happy Life.” A small part of it was devoted to a very important issue. The chapter is called “Accept, understand and forgive.” What prevents you and me from doing this? Illustration from my book, created by my daughter. Using the example of the animated series "Avatar: The Last Airbender" I will clearly show the process of acceptance. If you haven't seen this beautiful and deep Nickelodeon product, then sorry for the spoilers. A fictional world in which the "Fire Nation started a war", destroying all airbenders and enslaving earth and waterbenders. Only an 11-year-old boy - the concentration of all the elements, originally a monk from the people of the air - can stop the war. And in one of the episodes he ends up with a guru who teaches him acceptance. From chakra to chakra, from body to body (in yoga there are 7 “bodies” in humans), they walk the path of knowledge and forgiveness, opening the way for the energy of creation. The young magician-monk undergoes purification, but... He refuses to give up earthly attachments (the opportunity to create his own family). You can see for yourself how this fairy tale ends, but I suggest moving on to accepting your past. After all, personal history has shaped you, no matter what it is. What from the past blocks the creative energy of your happy future: - feelings of guilt towards yourself (self-criticism and self-blame); - shame for certain actions or inactions (inhibits the expression of emotions); - self-deception; - self-pity and/or resentment for something or someone as a path to despondency. Here I moved a little away from the vision of self-acceptance by chakras, as in the cartoon mentioned above. After all, we live in a secular state and the mindfulness I practice is a non-religious workout. But one way or another, these blocks prevent a person from accepting himself. Do you agree? Allow me to dwell in detail on such a mentioned obstacle as “pity + resentment.” Taken together, they amount to despondency. Why is despondency dangerous and to whom is it typical? People with pride are accustomed to blaming strangers, circumstances, and higher powers for all problems and failures. Such a person does not look for the causes of troubles in himself, only in the external. He sinks deeper and deeper into despair, because he expects solutions to problems from the world around him, from God. The dejected one asks: “Why me? What did I do to deserve this? But is he looking for wormholes in himself? No. There are many methods for processing and converting despondency into a resource. Psychologists practicing different approaches see different solutions. As a mindfulness psychologist, I certainly encourage clients to incorporate contemplative practices into therapy. In an interview with Forbes magazine*, Jaggi Vasudev, a famous Indian yogi, coach in large corporations and Ivy League universities, leading trainings for Sberbank employees (at the personal invitation of German Gref), training for Google employees, said: “I teach people that The outer world may be the stimulus or the trigger, but everything you feel happens within. Happiness and suffering, pleasure and sadness - all this is within you. If you want things to happen around you, you must adjust your inner mechanism.” Let me sum it up: “Accept, understand and forgive.” *https://yandex.ru/turbo/s/forbes.ru/forbeslife/366319-biznes-guru-chemu-yogin-i-mistik-sadhguru-uchit-grefa-i-google

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