«The Unsolvable Paradox of Sexual Relations in her book “Woman: A Guide for Men.” It consists of 2 parts - strictly according to the number of parties involved in the process.1. Women need an emotional connection to have sex.2. Men need sex for an emotional connection. It’s as simple as that. It is enough to swap cause and effect, and we will get one of the “unsolvable” paradoxes, which we, however, will try to resolve by the end of this article. I’m not like that / He’s not like that— “Nonsense! I can have sex with a man without an emotional connection." - "Nonsense! I can create an emotional connection with a woman without sex.” One hundred percent. You can also, on a dare, eat 4 kilograms of fried potatoes in one person. It’s not about what you can do. It is clear that the process can be started without emotional intimacy, but will you be happy if there is only such intimacy in your life? I suspect not. What about the man? Of course, he can establish an emotional connection with you through flowers, chocolates, romantic dinners, moonlit hikes, and even through poems of his own making. And you will love it. But for him - not always and not everywhere. Yes, this is also a way for him, but the most effective option for emotional rapprochement with you for a man in the prime of his life (we don’t take into account pimply teenagers and grandfathers with Alzheimer’s) was and will be good, solid sex .What to do? This is how it works. Therefore, if you suddenly feel that this topic is not about you, then feel free to pass by - you do not fit into the normal distribution, which is also quite normal, although it happens much less often. I invite everyone else to proceed further and turn to the first part the contradiction in question. Women need an emotional connection for sex. The stages of development of relationships in women, as a rule, look like this: - Intellectual stage - Emotional stage - Physical stage To simplify, we can say that women most often fall in love with a man’s mind, intellect. After this, they begin to seek emotional intimacy with the man. And after emotional disclosure, the woman strives for physical intimacy. In other words, it is rarely enough for a woman to see a handsome man to want to go to bed with him. To do this, she needs to go through two preliminary steps. First, to understand that “This guy is at least sane.” Secondly, to make sure that “He feels me. He cares about my emotions.” And when the first two points come together, the “command post” in a woman’s head begins to allow the possibility of intimate relationships and even actively seek them. The phenomenon of “Someone else’s husband” The depth and importance of this three-step model can be seen in the example of the phenomenon of “someone else’s husband” “What is the point? After a long separation, a woman cannot always easily enter into an intimate relationship, even with her own spouse. It would seem, what is the problem? This is my beloved husband... But for some reason he feels like a “stranger”, because during his absence the level of emotional unity between spouses has dropped, and in order to increase it, you need to spend a certain time and effort. For a man, sex after prolonged separation is a way of instant rapprochement, and he feels it as something self-evident. And here it is on you! You almost have to “conquer” your wife anew - create her mood, provide emotional comfort, return the state of unity that was before the separation. And then the husband again becomes loved and one of his own, the temporary feeling of “stranger” goes away. Now the next moment. Men need sex for emotional connection. As luck would have it, for men it’s the other way around. And in general they are kind of strange. How can sex lead to an emotional connection?! Can't be! Nonsense. I don’t believe it. Maybe. Warm words, hugs, romantic dinners and walks - these are all veryFine. But without access to the body, the main resource that creates (in the eyes of a man) a strong emotional unity in a woman is left behind. And why? Because the “male path” of relationship development looks somewhat different than the female one. The points are still the same, but they are shuffled differently. More precisely, they generally go in the reverse order: - Physical stage - Emotional stage - Intellectual stage What does this mean? This means that an ordinary man (statistically average, falling into a normal distribution) at the first stage of forming a relationship is nevertheless seduced by his appearance. Some kind of , but the attraction is on a physical level. You just look and think: “Wow, what a beauty!” Or, at worst: “Well, she’s so... attractive...” And, as a rule, the man, without much delay, begins to try to somehow provoke a moment of intimacy. Sex as a relationship stopper Not to be confused with stupor - this is about something else. So, a stopper is a part or device that stops and holds parts of a mechanism in a certain position. Sex is often just such a part. A detail that stops and holds your relationship with a man in a certain state. I think you already guessed which one - the very one in which you had this sex. Therefore, if you were impatient to release the energy of sexual desire to freedom through Svadhisthana, don’t be surprised if your relationship with a man suddenly “freezes” at the same level for some reason, or even begins to fall apart for no apparent reason. The same stopping effect that many people don’t like has worked. Yes, there will be no hit one hundred percent (because life), but in the vast majority of cases, expect exactly this development of events. Do you want some kind of conclusion? It’s better to do it yourself - it will be more valuable. In the meantime, let's move on...How to “tighten up” the male path? Do you really want to improve something? If a man immediately wants sex, but this event rarely produces the desired results, then the question arises: “What, exactly, should I do?” It’s all very simple. After initially being attracted to a woman, a man needs to go through both the emotional and intellectual stages of getting closer to her. And only then move on to sex. How long? Maybe. But answer yourself this question: Are you really planning to find a life partner by brute force, maybe you'll get lucky? Unlikely. I suspect that you don’t mind saving yourself from several (or even several dozen) unsuccessful attempts. If so, then re-read the sentence about what a man needs to do before engaging in intimate intimacy with a woman. Well, we we move on to the final part and deal with the question...What to do? As you remember, we started with an “unsolvable” contradiction that we intended to solve. The time has come. So, if you are not married, then in order to successfully solve our “quest” you need to flirt moderately, awaken a man’s imagination and indirectly reassure him. Each of these three points is worthy of a separate detailed consideration, but if we take the most important thing, we can limit ourselves to as follows. To flirt competently means to be able to show sympathy for a man without vulgarity. It is possible and necessary to awaken the imagination through an interesting image and correctly selected clothes (and these are not miniskirts and cut-outs up to the navel). Indirectly reassuring is to give a man various signs that things are going on goes in the direction desired for him (if, of course, you yourself want your rapprochement in the future to develop into a sexual relationship). By implementing this approach in practice, we will get an excellent result for both participants in the process. A man retains his motivation and inner enthusiasm to care for a woman , without harming herself, pushing into the background the strong desire for physical intimacy. As a result, the woman gains the much-needed feeling of emotional intimacy without the need to constantly fight off persistent “sexual harassment.” As a result, both come to the desired result. If you are married, then the strategy will be slightly different (although it does not exclude what we are talking about