A significant part of the work in therapy is working with aggression. When the word “aggression” is mentioned, the image of an open conflict, raised tones, and strong expressions usually immediately arises. However, aggression that has a direct and open presentation is of much less interest to therapists than that aggression that, hidden in the unconscious, is not recognized by the person showing it, and is disguised as a friendly attitude and a polite smile. However. Despite the fact that in therapy the therapist and the client have different roles, rights and responsibilities, they also have something fundamentally in common - they are both people, I’m not afraid of this word - people, and both have unconscious processes unfolding in therapy. This means that unconscious manifestations of aggression are characteristic in therapy not only of the client, but also... of the therapist. Moreover, if we are talking about pre-oedipal issues, the words “these are your projections” in response to the client’s attempt to draw the therapist’s attention to his aggression towards the client , so dearly loved by many experts, will not work here. Modern psychoanalysts urge you to listen to such projections, and at some moments to believe them even more than yourself, since the traumatic experience of a pre-Oedipal patient often allows him to read in relation to the therapist even what the therapist himself has not yet had time to realize and reflect on. example: A young man at the first session tells the following about himself: “You understand, I am Money, the only thing I know how to do in life is make money...”. The man is quite wealthy and yet pays his therapist less than the standard rate. One day, after another session, the client forgets the papers, and upon discovering them, the therapist is struck by the amount of income indicated in them, tens of times higher than his own. The therapist understands that he needs to talk to the client about increasing the cost of the session to the standard rate, since the current price is clearly not significant for both of them, but for some reason, over and over again, the therapist puts off this conversation. And then, one day at the end of the session, the client says that he forgot to change money and does the therapist have some change. The therapist, waving his hand, indicating “what little things,” says that this is not important and you can bring money another time. What do you think the client’s reaction is? The client experiences depreciation (“what little things,” “ it’s not important”) and rejection (“let’s do it another time”). Essentially, verbally and non-verbally, the therapist sends an unconscious message to the client: “you don’t want to pay, I don’t want to work with you and talk about you,” because the client said to himself that he is money, which the therapist talks about when working with him, great knew, but the therapist neglected money and treated the client’s money as something worthless, without respect for its significance. This message was, of course, unconscious, since on a conscious level everything looked extremely nice and friendly. The example is taken from open sources - a foreign public conference.