I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

reCAPTCHA v4
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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

reCAPTCHA v4
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This question is often asked by both young girls/boys and adult women/men. Let's go in order. Since such a question has arisen, it means that you really like each of the applicants in some ways and not so much in others. It’s understandable, men need a virginal slut, women need a sensitive macho... The first thing you can do is ask yourself the question: “Why do I need this (or another) person? What do I want from him or her? The answers may be different - I want to get married; I want to love/be loved; I want to start a family and have children; I want to be happy/happy; I want to settle down or live like most people at my age live, etc. But try to formulate your goal as specifically as possible and write it down somewhere in a notebook. The second question is “What is the most important thing for me in a relationship?” List what you value most in a relationship and without which you cannot imagine any relationship at all. Such values ​​can be: a positive attitude and humor; sincerity and openness; sex; loyalty; correspondence to your understanding of the female/male role (a man is strong and brave, a woman is kind and gentle, or vice versa), etc. Perhaps you will include everyday issues here - the ability to cook food or understand technology, etc., or maybe not. Write down your most important values ​​(it’s good if there are at least four of them) in the same notebook. The next step is to imagine each of your candidates or contenders in turn in the role that you assigned to them when answering the first question. For example, if you want to create a family with your chosen one, imagine him/her as a spouse. Relax and imagine how you will live, how you will communicate, what you will do, what you will talk about, etc. and so on. Replay in your head a few days of your life together, then speed up and replay a few years. If you don’t need a person for a long time, for example, five years, scroll through exactly these five years of your life in your head. If you are going to live together for a long time, imagine your whole life until the end or try to look as far as you can. After watching this internal movie, take a list of values ​​​​and think about how much your partner lives up to them or will be able to live up to them. The task may seem difficult, but you have known each other for more than a day and know how he or she behaves in certain situations. This material is enough to imagine exactly how you will solve life’s issues and overcome possible difficulties. Do this slowly and separately with each of your candidates. Now compare the two films. Which scenario do you like best? Weigh all the pros and cons, all the pros and cons. It is possible that somewhere or somehow you have painted a too ideal picture for yourself. Perhaps somewhere you see what you want to see and do not notice what you do not want to notice. Don't rush to conclusions. Let the weighing process take 2, 3 or more days. Perhaps after a certain period of time you will have complete confidence in this or that choice. You may want to take a closer look at your friends and girlfriends, at the feelings that their behavior in different situations evokes in you, etc. Perhaps you will even choose a third or fourth option that you didn’t consider at first... If something doesn’t work out or you are confused or lost, don’t be discouraged. Take a deep breath and begin the process again with the first step - identifying the purpose of your choice. Why do I need this (or another) person? What do I want from him or her? If this doesn’t help, call me. Good luck!

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