I spent a lot of time, at one time, counseling married couples where the spouse drinks. All stories begin the same way, and in fact they end the same way. The only difference is time. Some people endure it for a year or two, while others endure it for 7-10-15 years. The key mistake of women is that they do not want to see dependence from the beginning and believe that they can put their spouse on the path of truth. One client told me: “He divorced his first wife because he drank. But he swore to me that this would not happen again. He said that he loved me and was ready to change. Yes, he drank on holidays, sometimes with friends , but then..." A classic example where a woman is a rescuer, believes the words of an alcoholic. Dear women!! An alcoholic never admits that he is sick! You yourself take this step, knowing the bitter past! Well, why do you think that you are somehow special and capable of changing a person?) I know several examples when people drank, but then, as they describe it: “It was as if something clicked in my head and I realized that I don’t want it anymore.” And after this realization, not a drop was drunk. I know three of them have strong families and more than one child. Important point! These people entered relationships with changed thinking, revised values ​​and outlook on life. If you enter into a relationship and know that a man has been drinking, drinking, then he will drink! And you talk as much as you like, explain, cry, scream, send him to a doctor, code - all in vain! Run away from such relationships immediately if you want to preserve your nervous system and be happy! I believe that any addiction can be overcome, but for this it is necessary: ​​1. Realize that this is a problem 2. Realize how it interferes 3. Set new priorities and values ​​in life 4. Give up the habit 5. Start living with new meanings. Only this algorithm gives results!! But, alas, not everyone uses it, because it’s difficult! It’s difficult, because you need to take responsibility and stop engaging in self-deception and indulging yourself with illusions. Only a person himself is able to help himself and only through awareness! P.S. I sometimes hire couples with such problems, but I admit, I’m reluctant, unless they really ask! Why? Because the topic of alcohol in itself is not pleasant for me. In my family, this is a Taboo! And, as a rule, marital counseling quickly turns into an individual format, because the spouse is an alcoholic and does not see a problem in drinking alcohol! But I am happy when the wives stay in therapy and work to overcome codependency and try to get out from such relationships. The topic is about codependency and rescue - read the previous post Personal website: m-doverie.ru Dear readers, thank you for your attention to my articles! If the article was useful and interesting, give it a thumbs up. I will be glad to see you among my subscribers =) Group in vk INSTGR_LINKYou Tube