From the author: People often turn to a psychologist for advice. It seems to them that this is the person who knows best what is worth doing. He will advise you, and then give you a magic pill that will change everything. So I’ll be honest. This is a childish and infantile position. So what can a person count on when he turns to a psychologist? “I didn’t know where to go and went to the theater,” or how a psychologist can be useful Why should people turn to a psychologist, and when should they do it? People turn to a psychologist in situations that raise questions. What kind of situations could these be? Yes, any, ordinary, everyday ones. Should I change my job, and if so, what should I choose for myself? How to establish a relationship with a child if something is wrong with him. I can’t meet a man/woman, why and how to do it? You are not satisfied with your relationship with your husband, what should you do? It also happens that you are not happy with something in life or in yourself. And it seems that a psychologist, like a magician, will say something during a consultation that will immediately change the situation and give results. What may not suit you in life? I don’t feel satisfaction from sex, how to get pleasure? I feel insecure when communicating with others. I do not have friends. I am embarrassed to meet and communicate with men/women and relationships do not work out. My bosses at work scold me all the time, my colleagues treat me unkindly. I have a lot of work, I don’t have enough time for my personal life. I don't want anything. I can't find myself. I can’t understand my purpose or profession. I can't get pregnant. I'm not feminine/masculine enough. I can't make a lot of money. I feel guilty before others all the time. People constantly transfer all their affairs to me. I'm kind and they take advantage of me. I don’t know how to refuse people, to say no. I feel tired all the time, I don’t have enough strength for anything. I’m angry with my parents, I can’t forgive them for my childhood. I depend on others, I can’t get on my feet. Sometimes events happen in a person’s life that pull the rug out from under one’s feet. And without help it is difficult to cope with your grief, emotions, and condition. What events could these be? My husband left or my partner and I separated. Got fired. Lost a loved one. Another group of reasons why you can and should seek help from a specialist is when a person is “at odds with himself.” Experiences constant internal discomfort. This could be an anxious state, loss of strength, fear of people and events, a feeling of uncertainty, a general state of dissatisfaction with life, depression, constant doubts, uncertainty... In all these situations, people often turn to a psychologist for advice. It seems to them that this is the person who knows best what is worth doing. He will advise you, and then give you a magic pill that will change everything. So I’ll be honest. This is a childish and infantile position. When we want to shift responsibility for our life to someone else. A position where we consider ourselves helpless against external circumstances, and are waiting for the magical help of an adult (read parent) who will “raise the clouds with his hands.” And such advice therapy is unlikely to benefit you or change anything in your life. What can you count on when you consult a psychologist? At the very least, you will be listened to carefully. Also, that they will treat you and your problem with interest. That is, you and all your experiences will be interesting to some other person. You can count on the fact that this person (psychologist) is interested in your problem being resolved and you feeling better and happier. That is, you can count on empathy and support. If you are experiencing grief, a crisis in your life, then the psychologist’s office is the place where you can openly express your feelings, leaving your masks at the door. The psychologist is (supposedly) strong, he will cope, and will treat you with care and concern. At an appointment with a psychologist you can.