I’m sitting and preparing for the parents’ meeting at the gymnasium. I think what to say to parents so that they would allow their children to live. Did you smile or were you surprised?! Well, living not in that sense of life, but in the sense of living their own life, no longer interferes with the realization of their children's potential. We stopped pushing our parental expectations and hopes into them. Maybe it happened this way, but while watching the children of the institution where I work, for some reason I began to notice, or maybe I began to pay attention to, that we adults use children as a status confirmation of our worth, their position and react very painfully if children do not meet or confirm our expectations. For some reason, it is very rare now to meet an adequate parent. No, don’t think that I’m making diagnoses, not at all, just adequate in the sense of looking at my child sensibly. We all love our children, in any case, my experience of life and communication with many parents confirms this, and we all wish our children good. Just remember in the Bible - “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” This is how it turns out in life, we have good intentions, but for some reason lately, it seems to me, we have also been striving, out of somewhat selfish motives, to provide our children with the best, from our adult point of view. We are not at all interested in what our child wants, his aspirations, interests - we have stopped listening to our children! I observe that in most families, parents and children live in parallel, and there are no points of intersection anywhere. Why do I say this? Because more and more often we have to meet with the unhappy eyes of children, with empty eyes. More and more parents come with the question “what should I do, he’s not interested in anything?” . And where is the interest if we got him into the school that we consider the best, then into the best class, then with the best coach, then we’ll probably get him into a university, into a job “through connections”, and of course we’ll choose a wife or husband suitable in status . Where is free will? Where to show your abilities, initiative and interest? The closest people have already decided everything long ago or will solve it as problems arise. But the child came with his own unique set of abilities! Yes, he may not be a mathematician with parents who are mathematicians, and “not a genius” with “status” parents, but he is alive and has his own needs. And our task, the task of parents, is to be there, to help him develop, and not to decide for him how he will develop and in which direction! Our task is to create a field of love and faith in its uniqueness, and not throw it into the ocean of competition. Our task is to give him a sense of security, and we teach him to fight. Our task is to teach him to love and be friends, and this cannot be done without trust! Can we really talk about trust in people in life, in a world where “you know whose son or daughter you are and how you should behave, and what grades you should get”? Many children have been asking their parents for years to take them out of school, which they hate, and they hate it because in the class where they study, they simply CANNOT, due to their abilities, study at least a little bit the same way as others. But the parents leave, and it’s simply scary to look into the eyes of the child and see how every year the joy leaves them and emptiness settles in (and often anger, hatred, mistrust, and many others). I want to shout: “What are we doing with the children? " Our crazy ambitions of the adult world, our unrealized desires, our crazy desire to fit children into our status position (in order to match...) or simply because it is so COMFORTABLE for us - simply breaks children, takes away their interest in life, distorts their soul, sows cruelty in souls, pushes them into the emptiness of the virtual world and many others. etc. We can help our children! We can bring interest back into their souls by simply starting to listen to them. Listen to what they would like to do, listen when they play games, ask about their dreams and SUPPORT their stupidest desires (within reason...). How different would the world be if there were people living in it who would do?