When is it okay to yell “Help”? If your children still live with you and you take a moment to relax... You may remember your teenage years. The psychological world of a teenager is filled with problems much more more tragic than the pain from broken knees - these are already social traumas. Each age presents us with its own obstacles, and when faced with them, everyone receives their own “invisible wounds.” In many ways, life becomes more difficult as you get older. And more and more insurmountable walls stand in the way. All the big stones fall on your head. The wings no longer rise above the ground, but put pressure on the shoulders. And all of these metaphors give rise to very real feelings of anxiety, fear, inadequacy, anger, depression, helplessness, isolation and even shame. Adults who lack the psychological resources to comfortably solve emerging problems perceive these obstacles as insurmountable. Instead of seeing them as opportunities for growth and change, they become triggers that ultimately undermine self-esteem. It makes you smolder with a nagging feeling of hopelessness and helplessness. Or even encourage self-destructive behavior. Problems in adult life can be associated with a loss of a sense of identity, power and control. Life's challenges become overwhelming and frightening, especially if they threaten your sense of security. And many people tend to think that everything can only end badly or very, very badly. When life throws us a painful test, the need for reassurance increases dramatically. Being an adult does not mean you have outgrown your eligibility for support! The sooner you can reach out to people you feel safe and trust with, the more likely you are to emerge from this ordeal a stronger and wiser person. So who do we turn to when we need reassurance or support? Humanity has come a long way from the state of Homo homini lupus est (man is a wolf to man) to “Workers of all countries unite!” But what’s strange is that going for God’s or magical help does not always bring long-awaited peace. Seeing a psychologist is still very often perceived as taboo. There is a fear of being labeled as a mentally ill weakling! There's even a whole list of strategies that precede seeing a psychologist: Talking to friends and family Connecting with clergy Reading self-help books Watching talk shows that offer quick fixes for everyone Surfing the Internet to self-diagnose and find answers Posting your suffering anonymously in chat rooms and hoping for help And business It’s not that you can only get non-professional advice on the Internet. Relatives may well console you, but will they be able to understand?... All of the above actions can be the first step to understanding that, after all, only a specialist can understand you and not judge you for what you consider weakness. However, many patiently wait until their whole life falls apart before they turn to a psychologist. It is clear that here, too, a certain amount of courage is required to tell a stranger about your important and secret thoughts and fears. So why do many people think that asking for help is a sign of weakness. Like many of our other adult beliefs, is this also from childhood? If you can't decide to ask for help and can't understand why, take the time to “come into the rear of your memory.” Try to answer these questions. Perhaps they will reveal your secrets to you and will not keep you in place: Once upon a time, long ago, as a child, you could call and ask for help? And what did you get in response? How was it in your family: was it customary to talk, share problems that happened during the day? Do you remember really fun holidays together? What did you do together, as a family, or did mom knit socks in one corner, and dad read the newspaper in the opposite direction? Did you have friends in your childhood who you could trust with your secrets? Such that for you through fire and water, and you for!