In order to decide whether you need personal growth and in what direction we should take it, I suggest going through this simple, but unlike most of the Internet garbage on this topic, very useful test.-Riso and Hudson's QUEST test-Choose only one section, indicated by a letter in each of the two groups of statements below, that best describes your usual reactions and behavior in everyday life. You do not have to completely agree with every word or statement in the section you select. It is enough for you to agree with what is indicated in the relevant section only 80-90%. In general, you need to feel agreement with the main tone, and therefore the “philosophy” of the section you have chosen. You may not agree at all with some of the proposals in any of the sections. Don't reject this section just because you disagree with one word or statement! Look at the big picture again and again! Don't double-check your choices. Stop at the section that your gut instinct tells you, even if you consciously do not agree with its statements 100%. The overall meaning and perception of a section is much more important than each of its elements. Trust your intuition. GROUP 1 A. I have always considered myself a fairly independent and assertive person: I understood that life goes better when you face it head-on. I set my goals, throw myself into things and want everything to work out. I don’t like to sit still - I want to achieve great results and get to the point. I don't seek confrontation, but I don't let people push me. More often than not, I know what I want and I do it. I usually work hard and will stop at nothing. B. I was usually very calm and used to doing everything on my own. I usually don't attract attention to myself in society, and it is completely uncharacteristic of me to assert myself. I don't feel comfortable in leadership roles and don't like to compete with people like others do. Many may consider me a dreamer - most of my emotions are born and live in my imagination. I can be completely quiet and calm without feeling the need to constantly be active. C. I have always been extremely responsible and loyal. I feel terrible if I don't fulfill my obligations and always do what is expected of me. I want people to know that I am here for them and will do whatever I can for them. I often sacrificed myself for others, whether they knew it or not. I often do not pay enough attention to myself - I do what needs to be done, and allow myself to rest (at this time I do what I really want) only in the time remaining from the necessary things. GROUP 2 X. I am a person who always has a positive outlook on life and believes that things will change for the better. I will always find something to put effort into and keep myself busy. I like to be surrounded by people and make them happy - I like to share the good mood with them. (I don't always feel great, but I prefer not to show it to anyone.) Although, it has also happened that, while remaining positive, I actually put off solving my personal problems. Y. I am a person who gets overly emotional about what is happening around me - most people can tell that I am upset about something. I can be cautious with people, but I am more sensitive than I would like. I want to be sure of who I am with and who I can rely on, while for most people around me it is completely clear what their relationship with me is. When I'm upset about something, I want others to react and feel the same way I do. I know the rules, but I don't want to be taught how and what to do. I want to decide everything myself. Z. I usually control myself very much and act logically - it’s unusual for me to give in to feelings. I am efficient - even a perfectionist - and preferwork on its own. When problems or interpersonal conflicts arise, I prefer to solve them without emotion. Some people consider me too cold and distant, while I simply do not want my emotional reactions to influence the resolution of issues that are important to me. I usually don't allow others to see my reaction. -results compiled by I.V. Ladanov - 1. Answers CZYou are principled and rational, self-controlled. Because it's not good to make mistakes. And everywhere and in everything you use reason in order to try to do everything in this life ideally, well, as it should. But the source of all this is not inner truth and justice, but hidden anger and tension. Therefore, sometimes you strive to correct even the consequences of the wrong actions of others. To free yourself from the framework of this psychotype, it is necessary to eliminate the internal split “I am imperfect - I will be the most perfect,” so that you gain freedom, which is deprived by the constant need to prove your perfection to your inner part, which was offended once upon a time. And only then is it possible to accept yourself and the fact that you are good the way you are. You don't have to do everything right to do this. The world is not black and white, it should not be divided only into right and wrong. After all, goodness often lulls one’s vigilance, while troubles, on the contrary, force one to develop. You are probably too frozen in your own perfectionism, which now, instead of development, only creates problems.2. Answers CX Probably the central problem in life, or the common theme of all your problems, is “being worthy of the love and closeness of others.” You are a rather soft and not pushy woman who can create comfort. You often do something for the sake of others, for them. But you are not an angel - this loyalty to others is rather selfish. You need it to feel your own worth and need in this world. To finally start living for yourself, you need to focus therapy on healing the inner wound that hurts and drags you into depression every time someone questions your worth. Then the key to solving your problems will always be behavior based on your own needs and feelings, and not on others and their needs. Yes, the lifestyle described above makes you feel your worth in this world, but you are constantly losing yourself. There are days when, in caring for others, you do not have time to satisfy your own needs. It is also worth thinking about respecting the needs of others. For example, ask the people you want to take care of or help: do they need your help and care and what kind of help. After all, it is worth respecting the boundaries of others. Even sincere intimacy can be intrusive.3. Answers AZDesirable, outstanding, potential. You strive for success and impress others with your great image. Your desire to be valuable turns into a pursuit of status. Because you are sure: in this world you are loved for your achievements. And you are your image, formed so that others admire it. When you are successful and others think well of you, everything seems to be fine. But you often feel the emptiness of a squeezed lemon. Because “when you climb the ladder of success for happiness, usually at the very top you discover with disappointment that the ladder was standing against the wrong wall.” This does not mean giving up success and efficiency. Simply not striving obsessively to become a leader always and everywhere is again just playing to the public, instead of learning about yourself in action. Instead of enjoying the fruits of your achievements, you simply become exhausted, like a squirrel in a wheel. When dreams come true, when you get what you want, how long does it bring happiness? After all, happiness lives inside, and achievements only include it for a moment - until a new goal appears ahead. With the help of therapy, you can turn on the joy of life forever and then you will be able to find happiness in yourself, then when you look at the world through this prism, everything around you will begin to turn out much better. If, of course, you want such largechanges.4. Answers BYYour first reaction will be “this is not about me.” But if you think about it, you are a real whirlpool of emotions and feelings. You are unusual, unlike everyone else, unique in your sensuality and reactions to this world. You are a true gift to relationships. But who said that a gift in the form of a volcano of passions is so good? And this whole volcano of experiences constantly prevents you from being too effective or too happy in this life. You can cry when everyone around you is happy. Because the main thing for you is to be different from others. And this interferes with finding love and effectiveness in this world. Wanting to be yourself, you are only indulging your inner passions - believing that the emotions inside are you. This occurs due to the fear of being like all other women, of losing individuality and personal value to oneself. All your problems will be solved by understanding that individuality is not made from your own experiences. Not one of them at all. To understand this, it is necessary to gain emotional stability, to heal all the wounds of childhood, which, like sore calluses, make themselves felt today. Then you will have the freedom to stop living based on fantasies of love and other things. After all, individuality is not built from self-absorption and the phrases “Because that’s who I am and I don’t intend to do anything about it.” All this only distances you from people. And staying away from them does not bring happiness. Individuality is made by those around you. She is born among them and with them. But not against them.5. Answers BZYou are a perceptive, but at the same time aloof person. Basically, you don’t need communication to feel complete. You prefer to understand and study this world before getting lost in communication with other people, or maybe even doing without it. People around you only distract from correct understanding. After all, the worst thing in this life is stupidity and stupidity, which bring all the troubles. Therefore, you strive to understand everything, to understand, to gain specialization - often useless for everyone except you. The key to solving all problems will be the unexpected thought that the needs of your body are important, not just your mind. And to satisfy them you need to live in the world around you and interact with people. Otherwise, that melancholy feeling of loneliness and uselessness will forever remain, which you compensate for by gaining competence and intelligence. Therapy will bring you meaning in life, but not in the active mental one, but in the external world of which you are a part. It is not enough just to understand what the pudding consists of - it is also worth trying it in person. Or maybe even just try and not waste time on analysis.6. Answers CYYou are constantly in anxiety about failures and dangers that have not yet taken place. Because you are afraid to be left without support. The red thread that runs through all your problems is the desire to be safe. Excessive caution often deprives you of opportunities for development and self-realization. Structure, rules, principles, traditions - all these mental networks are like a saving trampoline for you in the world. So much so that you don't even trust yourself anymore. And constantly calculating future risks eats up the joy of any victories. The key to therapy will be to gain authority within yourself. This will help you build your own relationships with the world, instead of using other people's schemes. And such true independence is possible only if you honestly (to yourself) determine your needs and follow them. The main thing is to understand the meaning of the words: “If you are still alive, it means you have not made a single truly significant mistake in your life.”7. Answers AXYour lifestyle is a positive anticipation, liveliness, sociability, full of impressions and new things. You are a real generator of ideas and activities. The only trouble is that all this is for the sake of filling one’s own inner emptiness. Wanting to be happy, you simply run away from life into new hobbies or activities. Forgetting that happiness comes from within, not from without. And even more so, you will never be able to keep up with happiness if its source is only the anticipation of what.