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How not to scream when you’re not a child? How to cope with emotions when everything is boiling inside? I propose today to examine the topic of emotional state. Children and parents. So Thought➡️emotion➡️action➡️“difficult” behavior of the child. source: https://ugra-news.ru/⠀ALL emotions are important and necessary! There are no bad and good. Whether we have pleasant ones or not. Why do we need emotions?⠀They show boundaries and the path: - Joy means that we feel good and can repeat something similar - Irritation may indicate that boundaries have been violated - Fear protects against rash and dangerous actions⠀ Paying attention You can understand a lot of things based on emotions. And decide what to do about it.⠀1. Separate your emotions and desires from the child’s emotions.⠀Example: the son is SAD because he didn’t get what he wanted. I'M ANGRY because he doesn't understand that this is not possible. You and your child have the right to this. Give yourself and him time to live through these states.⠀2. Think about what these emotions show us?⠀The child is sad because what is important to him is what he wanted. Why does he need this? How can I get this in another way? Is it necessary?⠀3. Have different strategies in your arsenal. Talk, talk about feelings, ask questions. Hear it. Raise your voice if there is a threat to life. Apologize if you did something wrong. Speak through an I-statement. No accusations or insults.⠀Example: “I’m scared when you jump on rooftops.”⠀!IMPORTANT! We share only emotions that a child can endure due to age and share with you.⠀4. Be able to support yourself⠀It is important that the emotion goes into action. How to calm yourself down? Switch your attention. For example, you can leave the room for a few minutes: breathe, drink water, count to 20.⠀5. Help the child realize the emotion.⠀Draw, growl, shout, cry, jump⠀Parental irritation is an inevitable feeling. A healthy child will definitely express himself in such a way that you will not like it. If emotions are not expressed, they turn into diseases of the body. It is IMPORTANT to express them. But in such a way as NOT to destroy yourself and NOT to destroy others. For example, anger that is not expressed in an environmentally friendly way often turns into aggression. At the same time, it can be directed at oneself in the form of self-destruction: injuries, addictions, suicidal tendencies, self-abasement, self-harm. Or it can spill out onto another - insults, gossip, fights. What can be done to prevent this from happening? 1. Feel, identify the emotion.2. Live it, if possible, environmentally. Jump, run, give feedback to the person in the form of an I-statement.3. If it is impossible to react immediately, express it later, in a safe environment.4. Work on your worldview so that this emotion arises less often. Look for reasons, deal with them.5. Learn to direct the energy of emotions in the right direction. Explore yourself and your ways of interacting with the world. To start dealing with emotions right now, I suggest answering a few questions: 1. What emotions do you most often experience in response to your child’s behavior? What about the child?2. How do you deal with your emotions? What are you doing?3. How do you help your child cope with his emotions? Does it work? If the topic is interesting, I invite you to the FREE webinar “Mom, don’t yell at me".

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